It has been a long time since I have sat down and written something. Perhaps it is because I have been so busy or maybe avoiding my own thoughts. Regardless, here I am now with no internet and my thoughts are all I have.
The smell of fall in the air makes me homesick. Fall usually means running through my familiar trails – I miss the oldness and the color changes. I want to look over the river and feel warmth of the orange sun shimmering across the water. I want to know exactly where I am and how much further to go. I miss coming home to houseful of humans and dogs – all the noises and smells and excitement.
I miss early mornings with 8 legs of energy and my roommate. Coffee warmed our hands as we sprinted across the bridge to hide from the wind on the other side.
My first Thanksgiving away from home. I desperately miss my family. My heart feels so far away from the solitude of my cabin. It is funny that a place so isolated from everything is where I feel the least lonely in the world. I will even miss that long terrible drive from Edmonton, most of all when I make the turn into the provincial park and the air becomes crisp and road winding and the trees engulf everything around you.
I won’t be there for the family football game. I will miss arguing with my brothers. (Of course Merrick should get an interference call every single play.) I will miss watching my dad count out yards in his favor. I will miss sprinting through the field for a touchdown and watching everyone’s cheeks become rosy – of course all the while Balto would be getting in the way of everything.
I won’t be able to burst into my cozy little cabin to the smell of turkey.
We always go around the table and say what we are thankful for – as I am sure most families do. (Inevitably my brothers will both say “the food”) I suppose that this year I am most thankful that I have so much to miss.
And while my heart is longing for the mountains and the Thanksgiving I have never missed – I do have lots to look forward too.
The walls echo from empty spaces as I do the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning and anything else. Balto looks at me with his worried eyes and I am so happy that he is here. I wish I could take him to the river valley and run until both our lungs were ready to burst with cold fall air. I am sure familiarity will come with more runs and more people – but I sure am going to miss my cabin.